Features

Ms Havelock’s Christmas Cake

Ms Havelock has kindly provided us this lovely recipe for Christmas Cake.

Follow the instructions carefully, though. You wouldn’t want a mess at the end.

Miss Twigham’s Famous Roadkill Ravioli

Miss Twigham has, in her time, found much nourishment in the grass verges, hedgerows and roadside service stations of Britain and has also been able to conjure up many a meal from animals found on the tarmac – either found through accidental death or deliberate suicide. She suggests this as a method of disposal.

Lady Cressingham’s Book of Financial Management

We are pleased to present some choice verses from the invaluable “Book of Financial Management” by Lady Esmerelda Cressingham. We hope you will find their advice as useful as the ladies have done over the years.

Cut-Price Holiday-Making

A vacation abroad can be expensive so why not try the holiday experience at home? Using this system you can still feel alienated and alone, but at a fraction of the cost!

Dried Pasta and Cat-Litter Surprise

In an attempt to disprove Ms Zimmer’s assertion that “dried cat litter and pasta do not a dinner make”, Mrs Saxon has offered the following recipe for your consideration. (Her point of view is extremely persuasive to say the least.)

A History of the Pimlico League of Educated Ladies

Prepared under duress by Dr Cornish Fougus The Pimlico League of Educated Ladies is a venerable and mysterious collective (as indeed are many of its members). The group was originally one of the many and diverse chapters of the Penge Institute of Ladies of the Night and was, until recently, based across the world wherever […]

Words of Wisdom

Growing old is compulsory; growing up is optional.

— Bob Monkhouse

Top Tip!

  • Denture Fitting

    We have had to remind our members that it is not only bad form, but also unwise to appropriate dentures belonging to others. As Miss Radcliffe so tragically discovered, a correct fit is essential since loose devices can lead to accidental tonsillectomy.